We do pagan rituals with bonfires in our back yard all the time, and the neighbors never complain.

A Waukesha woman was arrested early Tuesday morning for disturbing neighbors by yelling witch chants around a bonfire she built 10-feet from her home, police Capt. Mike Babe said.Brenna K. Barney, 42, told police that they were infringing on her religious beliefs since she is a Wiccan and she was performing a ritual because of a new moon, Babe said. She said her name is Brenna Raven Moonfire.

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Don’t drink and drive. You might hit a bump and spill your drink.

A man in Orange County suspected of driving drunk was captured Tuesday night after he jumped out of a vehicle and ran from officers still holding a beer in his hand, according to the sheriff’s deputies.

Deputies said they spotted a vehicle Tuesday night and attempted to stop the driver on suspicion he was driving drunk.

The driver then led police on a chase that ended on Mott Avenue in the Lockhart area.

Officers said the driver tried to run them down before jumping from the vehicle and running away.

The man was spotted fleeing while still clutching a beer.

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Aren’t toy guns supposed to have bright orange barrels or something? At least here in the US they do. But, after all, what do we know about guns? Jesus, has common sense jumped out the window? Does anyone think that a 10 year old is going to have a real M-16 in England of all places?

Brodie Pearsall is no any ordinary 10-year-old boy. At this tender age, which child can say they’ve had an entire police force after them?After showing off his new £10 (about R150) toy gun to his friends, in a matter of minutes he was surrounded by armed police.

Officers with dogs ordered Brodie to put down the 18in weapon, reports the Daily Mirror.

Shocked neighbours called the police after spotting the realistic-looking gun.

But Brodie’s mum Gail, of Cradley Heath, West Midlands, said: “Brodie was in tears. They were shouting at him instead of talking to me. I think the whole thing is ridiculous.”

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They should have tasered her and beat her with a phone book and a hose to avoid bruising to teach her a lesson. I kid I kid.

911, what’s your emergency?

Kid voice: My diapers loaded

911: what?

Kid voice: POOP!

911: Who the hell is this? what’s your emergency?

Kid voice: I’m poopy

Authorities tracked down a 4-year-old girl who called 911 nearly 300 times last month by offering to deliver McDonald’s to her suburban Chicago apartment.

Unbeknownst to her mother, the girl used a deactivated cell phone to call dispatchers 287 times in June—sometimes as often as 20 times a shift.

Dispatchers heard the child’s voice but could only track the phone’s signal to the apartment complex.

So authorities used a ruse to pinpoint her.

“We asked (the caller) what she wanted. She said she wanted McDonald’s,” said Steve Cordes, executive director of QuadCom’s emergency center, which covers Carpentersville.

“We talked with her and we convinced her if she told us where she lives, we would bring her McDonald’s,” he said. “She finally gave us her address. So we sent the police over—with no McDonald’s.”

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Remember the good ol days when girls just baby sat for money?

A pair of pre-teen sisters are accused of kidnapping an infant in Enid on Thursday, police said.

The 10-year-old and 12-year-old girl allegedly broke into a neighbor’s home Thursday morning about 5:30 a.m., taking a 1-year-old baby while his mother, Sheila Wells, slept, police said. A ransom note was left. According to police, they were accused of kidnapping for extortion and first-degree burglary.

Officers said the girls not only took the baby boy, Brandon Wells, from a crib in which he was sleeping, they also took assorted baby items, $20 in cash and left a ransom note telling the mother of the baby that “if you want to see your son again, then you won’t call police and report him missing, and you will leave $200,000 on the sofa tonight, and we will return your son back safe.”

Police said the note was signed “the kidnappers.”

The mother of the suspects told investigators that she noticed the baby with the girls, who told her that they had “found the baby on the corner,” police said.

The mother recognized the baby as belonging to the victim, who lives about a block away. The suspects’ family and the victims are acquaintances.

As girls’ mother tried to find Sheila Wells’ telephone number, the 12-year-old returned to Wells’ residence and told her it was the younger sister who was responsible for the abduction, police Capt. Dean Grassino said.

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Wait a minute? What the phuck? God help me but I agree with Sharpton on this and I hate the guy. What the kid did isn’t even illegal anymore. There was massive douchebaggery involved since he videotaped it but a brother doesn’t deserve a ten year stretch.

They should have used the “at least he didn’t pee on her” defense.

The Rev. Al Sharpton embraced the mother and sister of a man serving a 10-year sentence for consensual oral sex with a 15-year-old, joining hundreds of supporters Thursday demanding his immediate release from prison.

Genarlow Wilson has been in prison for two years for taking part in the sex act when he was 17 years old.

“This boy is not only her son, he’s your son, he’s my son,” Sharpton told the cheering crowd from the steps of the Douglas County Courthouse. “We’re here today because what affects you affects all of us.”

State Rep. Alisha Thomas Morgan said Wilson’s punishment was excessive and should be reduced, just like the prison sentence for former White House aide I. Lewis “Scooter” Libby, which was commuted Monday by President Bush.

“Genarlow is the face of many other young black men who have received injustice,” Thomas Morgan said. “Somebody’s got to stand up for them.”

The crowd held signs that read “Free Genarlow” and “Justice Now.” The issues of race and class came up in many speeches.

“If he had a different complexion and a different connection, we wouldn’t be here,” Sharpton said.

Wilson, now 21, is serving a 10-year mandatory sentence for aggravated child molestation stemming from a 2003 New Year’s Eve Party where he was captured on videotape receiving oral sex from a 15-year-old girl. The law has since been changed by Georgia lawmakers, but the state’s top court said the new law could not be applied retroactively.

Wilson was also charged in 2003 with raping a 17-year-old girl at the party, but a jury acquitted him of the charges.

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This strange bird will walk. He’s going to win this case. The store made no attempt to stop him from trying on the clothes. The employee provided assistance voluntarily. No one smart enough to work in Victorias Secret would beleive that, they in the process of assisting a male patron who was trying to put on lingerie might see something they didn’t want to.

A man who police say exposed himself to two Victoria’s Secret store clerks while trying on women’s underwear faces two felony counts and a misdemeanor charge of retail theft. Police say Robert K. Scott, 47, went twice to the lingerie store in the Diamond Run Mall in April and May.

At his arraignment Monday, Scott was released on conditions, including that he abide by a curfew and stay away from the mall and the store.

The Rutland County Sheriff’s Department, which provides security at the mall, investigated the incidents.

Sheriff’s Deputy Andrew Cross wrote in a sworn statement that Scott went to the store on April 22 and told a female clerk he wanted to try on some lingerie and panty hose.

“Scott asked her to stay close by while he was in the dressing room,” Cross wrote,” adding that “Scott then had her look at him to see how the items looked on him.” When she looked, “she could tell he had no underwear on.”

Scott returned to the store May 6, picked out several items, went into a dressing room and then began calling a female clerk for help.

Scott then opened the door, wearing a white top, red heels and no underwear, exposing himself to her, Cross wrote. The clerk said Scott made no attempt to cover himself, the affidavit stated.

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If I was in her shoes I would probably do the same thing. Can not say I blame her.

LANSING, Mich. (AP) - A state forensics scientist who said she tested her husband’s underwear for DNA to find out if he was having sex with another woman is being investigated to determine if she violated state policies against using state equipment for personal reasons.

Ann Chamberlain-Gordon of Okemos testified in a March 7 divorce hearing that she ran the test last September on the underwear of Charles Gordon Jr. Asked by his attorney what she found, she answered, “Another female. It wasn’t me.”

She also said during a May 25 hearing in Ingham County Family Court that she ran the test on her own time with expired chemicals that were to be thrown away.

The Michigan State Police, which oversees the Lansing forensics laboratory where Chamberlain-Gordon works, is conducting an internal investigation and expects to decide by next week if disciplinary action should be taken.

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1st eye shame on Po. 2nd eye shame on Kwok.

A HONG Kong woman who blinded her boyfriend in one eye in a fight six years ago has been jailed for jabbing a chopstick into his other eye.

Last November, Po Shiu-fong, 58, accused long-time boyfriend Kwok Wai-ming, 49, of having an affair, the South China Morning Post reported.

During the row, Po stabbed a plastic chopstick into his left eye, which she had already blinded six years ago when she poked it with her finger.

“Po became hysterical when she saw the wound and mopped it with a towel. The pair then went to bed,” the paper said.

“The next morning they had another argument in which she grabbed a chopstick and stabbed Kwok’s right eye,” it said.

Two days later, he sought medical treatment and filed a police report against Po, whom he had dated since 1993.

The paper said he didn’t report the attack six years ago, telling the court his silence was “a love sacrifice”.

Kwok lost 10 to 20 per cent vision in his right eye, the paper said.

Po was jailed for six months yesterday.

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The only thing I’ve seen a peacock eat that I thought was weird was one stole a chocolate ice cream from my cousin at the zoo, never seen one suck blood. Have seen an albino one too, looks funny, all white.

A peacock that roamed into the parking lot of a Burger King in New York City was beaten by a man who insisted it was a vampire.

Animal control officials in Staten Island say the bird was beaten so fiercely that most of its tail feathers fell out and it had to be euthanized.

The seven-year-old male peacock wandered into the restaurant parking lot and perched on a car hood last week. Charmed employees had been feeding it bread when the man appeared.

A restaurant worker says the man grabbed the bird by the neck, hurled it to the ground and started stomping it. She says when he was asked what he was doing, he responded, “‘I’m killing a vampire!”‘

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