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Archive for the ‘Urban’ Category

Ill suck yo’ dick for a crack rock!

Seriously though crack heads are just going to god damn far for the rock! The scrap yard should just tell them to fuck off! But yeah, one good way to spot a crack head, I say,

Gold jewelry, diamonds and expensive watches usually top a rummaging burglar’s checklist. But nowadays, a less-precious metal is exploding in popularity among street-level thieves. They’re after anything copper - pipes, gutters, flashing, boilers, wires or sheets.

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I gots 5 on it

Yo bitch, I mean mom, lets hit this shit. Just another fine example of the ghetto at its, erm, finest. I hear Amanda Livelsberger has the best dope in town!

A 13-year-old Pennsylvania boy says his mother required him to do his homework first thing when he got off the school bus — then smoked marijuana with him as a reward.

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Moses lives!!

Well maybe not that Moses, but a black guy with the same name. Moses Castillo want’s his titties… homie!

About 4:30 a.m. Saturday, while in a deep sleep, the woman felt what she thought was a roach crawling on her. Something then brushed across her breasts and elsewhere. She turned over and cursed the bugs. “Then, he slipped his nasty tongue inside my ear,” the woman said Sunday, sitting on her front porch a block away from North Florida Avenue.

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Looking for a job?

So are you looking for a job? Sick of laying around the house smoking weed and bitching about your hoes? Well fret not Tyrone, you can get a job. You, too, can be a Police Sketch Artist. Newberg Oregon Police officers are looking for a sketch artist we think.

Police are looking for a rapist on the loose in Newberg. Police have released this sketch, click here of the suspect.

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Rodney King In Reverse

They dont have to take this shit any more! What the fuck is our world comming to? We cant smoke crack in the streets and rob people? We cant lay around the house? We have to work? What the fuck? Get a job? Nicole Simpson cant rap! I want justice.

Officer Russell May’s dash camera was rolling when he responded to a disturbance call in a McKinney neighborhood. Local 6 News aired videotape of May approaching the passenger side of a car and asking the people inside to get out.

A man, who police identified as Joshua Jones, was then shown jumping out of the vehicle and attacking the officer for no apparent reason. When he hit me I figured he was going to take off and run,” May said. “That’s what a lot of them do.

The videotaped beating continued for several minutes.

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Yeah yo my grandma slangs rock

Only in the ghetto, I say! Esther Gomez has her pimp hand way strong. Esther, what a pretty name.

A 76-year-old woman accused of producing and selling heroin from her home has been arrested.” … “Sheriff’s deputies also seized a 2005 Lincoln Town Car, which had been paid for in cash, a 1983 Mercedes, and about $40,000 worth of jewelry.

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Domino, mutha fuckah!

Domino’s at its finest!

An arrest warrant was issued Sunday for an Allentown man who police say took dominos to a violent extreme. Reynaldo Nieves, 38, of 25 Cleveland St., allegedly attacked his girlfriend, Ana Alicea, early Sunday after she and her sister won their third game of dominos at 1045 Livingston St., Bethlehem, police said.

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Tyrone wants his Xbox bitch!

Well I am sure we all remember this story. Well its time to burn these fools. Lets hope they all get the chair eh? I mean I love video games just like the rest of us, but its just not worth it Tyrone, you could have just slung some more crack rocks and pimped out some dirty African sluts to get your paper for yo’ xbox son! Have a good life and happy trails!

Prosecutors allege Troy Victorino, 29, Robert Cannon and Michael Salas, both 20, and Jerone Hunter, 19, organized the attack to retrieve an Xbox video game system that Victorino lost when he was kicked out of a different house in Deltona.

Kay Shukwit is still trying to cope with the August 2004 deaths of her daughter and five of the young woman’s friends, who prosecutors said were beaten to death with aluminum bats over an Xbox video game system.
“I’m living with the loss. I’m living with the horror, with all the thoughts and everything and I still can’t believe what’s going on,” said Shukwit, whose daughter, Michelle Nathan, was 19 years old.

Jury selection is set for Monday in Deland for three of the four men charged with the beating deaths.
Prosecutors allege Troy Victorino, 29, Robert Cannon and Michael Salas, both 20, and Jerone Hunter, 19, organized the attack to retrieve an Xbox video game system that Victorino lost when he was kicked out of a different house in Deltona.
The victims, some of whom were sleeping, did not resist or try to escape the attack, investigators said.
Salas, Victorino and Hunter are charged with six counts of murder and eight other felonies. Cannon already has pleaded guilty and will receive life in prison in exchange for his testimony. Prosecutors said they will seek the death penalty for the remaining defendants.

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That aint yo babyz daddy nukkah!

Nothing like a good ol’ fashioned ghetto baby shower!

An argument at a baby shower escalated into a brawl in which one man was shot and the pregnant guest of honor was beaten with a stick, police said.

Authorities said the shooting victim, Aristotle Garcia, got into a fight with a man who is dating his ex-girlfriend. The argument, over whether the woman let their 5-year-old daughter drink beer, escalated and drew in two other people — Jazz Rivas and Juan Velazquez, said Police Lt. Cheryl C. Claprood.

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Cry me a river 2pac

Yeah so did Tookie Williams bitch. Welcome to the chair! Oakland gang member Demarcus Ralls can not cry his way out of this one!

An Oakland man convicted of four killings said he cries in his jail cell and prays whenever he thinks about the crimes he’s committed.

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